Self Sabotage or: Sleeping Through the Recycling Truck

Every Tuesday around 5am the recycling truck comes by. The guys on the truck throw dozens of giant bags containing hundreds of bottles, jars, cans and containers, as loudly as they possibly can, into the back of the truck—I guess they figure if they have to be up we should be too. For the first several months after I moved back to NYC they woke me up, EVERY TUESDAY, but with repetition it became familiar and now, blessedly, I sleep through the recycling truck.

I'm in the process of transforming my life—after 30+ years as an Art Director I have started a 2nd career as a Life Coach. Sometimes I'll have an amazing opportunity as a result of the efforts I've put in, and I'll find myself in what Joe Dispenza refers to as the labyrinth of the unknown where, he tells us, it’s tempting to go back through the same door you came through because we’ve conditioned ourselves to crave the familiar.

In other words: This is scary, maybe I shouldn’t do it.

The desire to retreat happens right when we're on the edge of a breakthrough. Just when we're close enough to touch what we've been working for we're flooded with thoughts and 'reasons' why it's not a good idea, and the urge to turn back, now. We convince ourselves it’s the right thing to do, to turn back, but actually it’s self sabotage.

Self sabotage sounds like this: I'm not really sure this is what I want to do; This won't work; I've never done this before; I'm not good at [fill in the blank]; I don't know how; This is overwhelming; This isn't right for me; They're probably asking me just to be nice; They asked because they couldn't find anyone else; I'm too old; I'm too young; This is a mistake.

Most of us aren't even aware we're doing it because it's so automatic, we just think we're giving ourselves the hard truth. But what we're actually doing is sleeping through the recycling truck. We've gotten so used to the noise in our heads we're not even conscious of the thoughts—but on a subconscious level they’re driving our decisions.

We give in to the fear and don't follow through, we use it as proof that we were right, we are too young, or too old, or don't know enough, or aren't ready. That is the familiar place we crave. That is self sabotage.

This is why you don't stick to your diet—don't follow through on that business idea; don't exercise consistently; don’t apply for that job—you give yourself an excuse to quit, or you don't even try, you fail before you start.

Now that you have this great bit of information how can you use it to change your life?

Understand that your brain is always looking for the fastest, most accessible thought—and that's going to be ones you think the most, the subconscious thoughts of self doubt. So you have to put in extra effort and reach around those thoughts to access the new ones that aren't as developed, the ones that tell you that YOU CAN DO IT. It takes practice, it's like going to the gym, you're building mental muscles.

And though our default is to crave the familiar, Joe D. reminds us that we can fulfill our dreams: ...the person who is truly committed to the greatest expression of themselves is fearless, because they trust the experiences they’re going to have along the way—and they trust that each experience is going to reveal something greater.

I trust. Do you?

This is what my work is about. I'd love to hear about your dreams and help you realize them. Schedule a free call if this intrigues you.